Five Stage Interview Structure: Review and the New

THE REVIEW:
Since the first part of Chapter 7 was a review about the skills that we have previously covered, I decided to reflect on what I think my weaknesses will be as a counselor with regarding the skills that we have covered.

1. Empathy: I am a complete empath. I have no problem being in someone else's shoes. My difficulty will lie in separating myself from the client. If I see them cry, I will cry. I feel that I will take my work home with me and have some of my own anxiety from worrying about a client. Finding a way to let go, and be present for myself, my family and my other clients will be crucial in maintaining good relationships throughout.

2. BLS: Listening, presence, and intentional interviewing will provide the challenge of holding in my own input. I am naturally a fixer, like I mentioned in class and I want to tackle a problem head on and make everyone happy and feel better. It will take some practice in holding back my suggestions and need to "fix" and just focus on the BLS.

Upon examining these challenges as a counselor, I can't help but note that school counseling would be the right choice for me. Recognizing my struggles with tendencies of being overly empathetic and even sympathetic, I don't see myself as being a good therapist, or marriage and family counselor. I know now that I should stick to school. The realization that one is on the right path is a good place to be. :)

THE NEW:

As mentioned previously, I am a fixer, so I am pleased to find that this chapter covers the five stages that includes story and strengths, goals, restory and action. The text mentions Reality Therapy. I am interested in using this as a technique as I think it will reach young adults. I just recently met the garden educator at the UT gardens and he is beginning a horticulture therapy program. I love the idea of using real world situations and scenarios to gain access, build rapport and use skills gained to apply to other avenues of life.

Next, in the story and strength and goal setting stages, the book states, "the positive asset search should be part of this stage of the interview." This implies going back to the wellness model and it never hurts to focus on someones strengths. I thought this kind of overlaps with some of the suggestions in action-concluding. Using creativity and homework, role playing and even visualizations and meditation can lead a client to discovering their own positive attributes and even help them set their own goals. The counselor may see a strength and see a clear path to a goal but the client may see a root cause and an alternative goal.

Again, I really like the tables offerend that give sample interviews. They make the skills accessible and having the specific wordage is helpful for reference when we do our practice days.

Observing and Reflecting: The Inner Layers of the Onion

"The most effective interviewer or counselor consciously or subconsciously-develops proficiency in the art of tuning in with feelings."

-Ivey, Ivey and Zalaquett

Ah, feelings...now we are getting to the meat on the bone. But, with it comes increasing intensity and complexity. The textbook mentions that feelings are layered, like an onion. Yet, like feelings, the process of accessing those implicit feelings is as layered as the feelings themselves. Conversely, I think more like a spiral. A counselor, especially a beginning counselor, starts at the precipice, jumps in and slides ever increasing toward the center, the more complex, the higher numbers in the Fibbonaci sequence. The precipice is the basic listening sequence and like the textbook says, the sequence could not exist without reflection of feelings because thoughts and feelings have an emotional base. But that is just the metaphor for my mind, for simplicity sake I can dig the onion analogy and run with it.

So, we have traversed through skills that focus on us, the helper or counselor. Now, we are moving across the spectrum into uncharted territory. I sense, in this reading, we are embarking on a shift. We helpers have learned to be aware and attentive, with ways to illustrate to the client that we are interested and listening. We now are using our toolbox to aid the client in awareness and attention in the realm of their inner self.

I have always heard in substance abuse counseling that the acknowledgement that one needs help is the first step to recovery. Similarly, when one suffers from anxiety or even has a career or life event in question, the answer is inside them and their awareness of the answer is the first step. Reflecting feelings like a mirror, paraphrasing eloquently or simply into words at all can be such a powerful tool that clients don't even realize that a counselor is using a technique. It is precisely this subtlety that lends it a profound effect. True, some clients will only need a brief acknowledgement of these feelings that lead them or start them on their personal journey. Other clients may need more guidance. I know how important these techniques are particularly with children and adolescents whom will inevitable need more in depth reflection. I found the table/sample interview on page 118-119 very helpful. One box in particular warranted my highlighting.

"Jennifer did three things here. 1. She reflected Stephanies's here and now emotions. 2. She identified a positive assest and strength and 3. She suggested that Stephanie take a breath."

The method reminded me of a poster I would have in my office or something...presence, positives, pause. Focus on the present, examine the positive, and pause to take a breath. In addition to this I brainstormed a few activities for young folks that can help them reflect their feelings that can be helpful to effectively communicate and perhaps expression as an alternative to acting out in anger or fear. I already do these things, on a simplified level, with my toddler. Who, like any other toddler, screams and throws tantrums. I jotted the ideas down and used the shaded box 6.2 on page 121 as a guide.

At the beginning of the chapter Allen Ivey has a quote, similar to the one above.
"The artistic counselor catches the feelings of the client. Our emotional side often guides our thoughts and action, even without our conscious awareness." As natural helpers, we have a knack at peeling back the outer layers and seeing straight to the inner layers, the core. We are well on our way, sharpening the paring knife. I can just feel it.

Active Listening: Intentionality in Thought and Response

"When clients sense that their story is heard, they open up and become more ready for change."
-Ivey,Ivey and Zalquett

I can tell when my husband is on the computer, working when I call him and try to talk to him about something and he has a delayed "mmhmmm" despite whether I asked him a question or not, followed by "Wait, what?" The anger and frustration makes me want to just hang up the phone. Ivey, Ivey and Zalquett mention that what we listen and respond to has a profound influence on how clients talk to us about their concerns. So, like the old saying goes, if we snooze...we lose. In other words, that anger and frustration we all feel when we know we are not being heard, like when on the phone with my husband at work, will cause a giant rift in the client/counselor relationship, regardless of any rapport or relationship built prior.

We have already discussed that awareness is the first step in active listening and body language and eye contact communicate your open-ness and willingness to present to your client, but Encouraging, Paraphrasing and Summarizing seem to culminate these other basic skills. Encouraging, Paraphrasing and Summarizing both communicate to your client that you are actively listening and aid the counselor in ensuring clarification of the client's story or feelings.
However, I think that a beginning counselor must take care not to sound methodical or robotic when paraphrasing or summarizing, for fear of the environment feeling too clinical. To combat this notion, I like that the textbook pointed out that in Mary and Damaris's interview, Mary's style was described as very involved with constant encouragement and smiles. The text calls this "warmth" and reminds us to focus on communicating "warmth" to all clients. This concept particularly resonated with me because I would be in a counseling setting with adolescents or young adults who especially need to feel that their story is being heard and may have a difficult time trusting or being comfortable with another adult.

Another overarching theme that I noticed regarding the use of Encouraging, Paraphrasing and Summarizing is control. These skills can be used by the counselor to have some control over the conversation. I think of using them like a steering wheel. Leaving your hands and 2 o'clock and 4 o'clock shows your client that you are attentive but inherently gives you control over the direction to which you both are heading. While I don't particularly like using the word control, perhaps a better analogy would be that these skills are weights to which a counselor can add or subtract to maintain balance or equilibrium.

Finally, I appreciate the note at the end of the chapter about developing skills to help the bilingual client. To elaborate, I know a little bit of Spanish, but I have always been timid about speaking Spanish, especially to a native speaker. I never thought about the client also feeling inadequacies in their attempts at explaining their feelings in their second language. How genius to, like the example provided, let the client recite aloud their intended emotion in their mother tongue and then restate it in English! Pure genius! AND, I would not have thought to pick up familiar phrases and words in the client's native language and use them in conversation with them. I always thought doing so would deem me a "Spanglish" speaker. I do know that now, I will try out these techniques, if presented with the opportunity. These realizations show me too, that often in our attempts to be culturally sensitive, particularly when our ethnicity is in the majority, our egg-shell, no toe-stepping pseudo-political correctness can actually be detrimental to the client counselor/relationship. In sum, even if it is some form of mangled Spanglish, clear the air. They will surely appreciate a sincere effort and you just might provide them with a good laugh.

Attending and Observation Skills: Complex Simplicity

"Without attention, nothing will happen."
-Ivey, Ivey and Zalaquett

This statement is true. And yet, heightened awareness and attention can seem like missing the forest because of the trees. Such seemingly simple tasks like listening, eye contact, body language...hold the power to move a client's mountains or at least, mole hills. But, everyone has done "it". I know I am the worst. What's the crime, you ask? Story Exchange... I love to talk. So, you tell me a story and I'll tell you mine. The book gives the prime example in the table on pages 59 and 60. Dear Jerome, I can relate.

Wounded and embarrassed thinking back to all those times I have "Jeromed", I began think back to successful counseling sessions. Rather than dwelling on my shortcomings, I mentally noted the attending skills that counselor exhibited that proved successful for me regardless of my willingness or unwillingness or any given day.

First, I will preface with a confession. At the advent of college, like most young adults, I experienced heightened anxiety. Between an unhealthy relationship, being in the wrong major, and an even worse job, I began having panic attacks. I began seeing a counselor, I will just call her Dr. B., for help in dealing with my self-esteem and anxiety. She was a life-saver! This class makes me appreciate her expertise even more, because I can reflect back and note the small but crucial methods she employed. Not only did she exhibit great attending skills but she taught me how to reciprocate.

1. Body Language: Dr. B made me aware that my face did not match my emotions. She pointed out that while I would be telling a very sad story, I did so with a smile on my face. I can only imagine how insincere the situation seemed. While the book mentions mirroring the client's body language, I know that I need to be aware of my personal tendency toward movement dissynchrony. For example, I would smile as a gesture of friendliness (after all it is how a Southern girl is taught) not matter the tone of the moment.

2. Vocal qualities: Dr. B always knew when to point out that I needed to slow down or when silence was necessary to open a pathway to open-ness. She would say, "I am hearing in your tone that you are phrenetic. Let's do a short breathing exercise to focus." And sometimes when I was particularly closed off and stressed, she would simply be silent and let me work through a guided meditation.

It is these little things that make for a memorable counseling experience, so complex and yet so simple. Attention so much is possible with attention.